(sorry for punctuation) I’m a guy.
I’m tired of my dad letting me down. I’m 16. I don’t live with my dad. I lived with him for the summer and like they have no standards. I was the cleanest out of all of them they didn’t take care of themselves and didn’t keep their rooms clean. that included my dad it was ridiculous how dirty they were. I’m lazy but I have standards. I live with my mom. My mom does the best she can do for me and I understand that she’s trying she may not get me what I want but what I need and I know why because she knows my dad won’t do a thing for me. My dad left me when I was younger for about a year iI know it was a long time. He said "he was getting his life together" Finally after all that time i see him again. He takes me to meet his new family. He has a new wife and a stepson(18) and stepdaugther(16). They bully me and i’ve told him about it and he just laughs. To me he shows more care for them than he does for me. His house is super dirty they have a dog that pisses on everything and there never clean it up. I don’t like spending nights there because of how dirty it is. I alays have to sleep on the couch because i have no room there or even at least a guest room. They are more active i would say than me because there in rotc/sports and have really high rank and i was in rotc and quit because i didn’t want to do it and then my dad wouldn’t talk to me for over a month. Now my dad is saying he;s gonna help me get a driver license and teach me to drive. It’s been nearly 3 months since he said that. he only took me driving twice but has taken my stepsister dozens of times. Christmas came by and he didn’t get me anything but they got ipods and everything. my birthday passed and he didn’t do anything for it. There birthday came and he went all out. Another christmas and birthday of mine go by and he does the same thing. I know I’m 16 but I can’t find a job and have tried. I’m tired of this and when i try to talk to him about it he takes it like its a joke. he calls me names like nerd and stuff. I’ve tried multiple times. I’m to the point where I’m thinking of cutting him out of my life if he’s going to be that way. What should i do and how would you feel if you were in this situation?
Basically pretty much most of what Chris N posted in reply i agree with.
If i was in your situation i would feel pretty outraged and tired of it as well, just like you. Now what I’m going to advise may not sound easy, since i am not in your situation but I’ll do my best to give my best.
Think about this carefully. Do you really want to spend time with you dad? You’ve been trying. I can see by your post on here that you have, but if all you get out of it is frustration, why continue to stay there? If they treat you bad why stay there? 
your mom sounds really nice and i would stay with her, you know? help her out both of you make it together because this one summer you spent with him, sounds super scary o.O. I think the best thing that applies is love the person, but not their choices. i really encourage you to do the best you can to love and forgive your father and his new family, but don’t try and put yourself through things like that with him. stick with your mom, and really stick to your standards. because even if he wasn’t there, she was, and you’ll definitely grow to be someone respectable. if you have any really friendly neighbors who wouldn’t mind teaching you to drive, and taking you out driving you should ask them, and see if your mother would take you driving. some schools have special programs like Driver’s Ed and such, and I’m positive if you don’t have the money to pay it all off at once, you can pay in installments. She or He who teaches the course should be able to teach you to drive (since it’s their job.) Even if you’re home-schooled most schools will allow you into the DE course.
as for a job, i myself am having the same issue. you should just keep going out and filling out applications. don’t be upset if the job isn’t exactly dreamy, a job is a job and it pays bills and buys school clothes.
I know 
it must be really painful that your own father would do these things but you have a heavenly Father. I don’t know if you believe in God or not, and I won’t pressure you to, but just know that you do have one and he loves you very much.
I would encourage you to find a good positive father figure in maybe a favorite teacher of yours or perhaps a neighbor you get a long with. someone who will encourage you and really do the good things a father would do for his son.
ha ha i don’t know about you but where i come from nerd is a compliment. I’m a literature nerd XD and i love every bit of it!! its nothing to be ashamed of it shows intelligence and talent because not everyone has the brains for getting their nerd on XD
just remember if your dad can’t man up and be a dad to you as well then he isn’t worth worrying over (as much as it may hurt.) i don’t mean to just shut him out of your life because that wouldn’t solve anything, i just mean that you shouldn’t care about his opinion of you at all. I’m super proud that you actually tried to fix this problem and i suggest you try one more time to seriously sit down and tell him to get his act together for you. serious confrontation is something to consider. call him out on his promises in a way he cannot deny them. if you do this then you can say you tried and be completely blameless in the fact that your relationship with him isn’t that great. you tried and that’s what counts.
try and find a good school program or club or team to join that you enjoy. debate, chess, forestry, or whatever clubs your school has to offer, join one that could give you a chance at a scholarship and also a very good
:/ also, stick up for yourself. get the point across to the step dorks that you don’t like them messing with you and that they should back off (just don’t go crazy with it o.o be smart about it)
Good luck!!! and happy late birthday and late merry Christmas 
OK – so you don’t have a full time dad to help you out growing up. Solution is to go to your Church and let them know your situation and ask for help. Join the youth group there and talk to people who can help you grow up.
References :
I think I’d feel just the same as you do. Sad that he’s not the dad I would like him to be, glad that I do get to see him at times but jealous that he seems to prefer his new family to me. You sound a very level-headed 16 year old and you seem to have your dad sussed out pretty well. OK he’s a bit weak but he’s still your dad and obviously wants to you stay with him occasionally even though from your point of view this staying over isn’t the wonderful time he thinks you are having. He lives a different life to you and your mum and his new wife obviously has different standards of cleanliness etc to your mum – but this applies to most people in the world. We are all different and our homes are all different, clean, dirty, messy, spick & span etc. You cannot change your father so don’t even try. I wouldn’t go so far as to totally cut him out of your life because you might feel differently about him the older you get, but I suppose you could wean yourself away from these unpleasant visits. Perhaps you could arrange to meet him on your own occasionally or just stay there for the day. Ultimately you might have to tell him you are allergic to all the dog hairs as a get-out without actually insulting him and his wife about their home. That wouldn’t be a good thing to do. I don’t think your dad’s the right person to help you find a job. I think you have to do it all yourself with maybe some advice from your mum. You are only 16 so you have loads of time to get one. Or maybe you can do a college course to better qualify you before you start looking round for something lucrative. The mere fact that you actually want a job means you are half way to getting one. If you are determined to do well, you will do well. If you really want a job you will apply yourself to getting one and you will eventually get one because you won’t have defeated yourself by your attitude before you start. I feel sympathy for you discovering the frailties of your dad at such an early age. People are usually a bit older than that before they discover their close relatives aren’t actually superman and superwoman. He’s just human and is trying to make his new life work so you are sidelined for the time being. Ultimately, you are his biological son so you will find in the future that you probably do come first in his eyes. Good luck
References :
Basically pretty much most of what Chris N posted in reply i agree with.
If i was in your situation i would feel pretty outraged and tired of it as well, just like you. Now what I’m going to advise may not sound easy, since i am not in your situation but I’ll do my best to give my best.
Think about this carefully. Do you really want to spend time with you dad? You’ve been trying. I can see by your post on here that you have, but if all you get out of it is frustration, why continue to stay there? If they treat you bad why stay there?
your mom sounds really nice and i would stay with her, you know? help her out both of you make it together because this one summer you spent with him, sounds super scary o.O. I think the best thing that applies is love the person, but not their choices. i really encourage you to do the best you can to love and forgive your father and his new family, but don’t try and put yourself through things like that with him. 
stick with your mom, and really stick to your standards. because even if he wasn’t there, she was, and you’ll definitely grow to be someone respectable. if you have any really friendly neighbors who wouldn’t mind teaching you to drive, and taking you out driving you should ask them, and see if your mother would take you driving. some schools have special programs like Driver’s Ed and such, and I’m positive if you don’t have the money to pay it all off at once, you can pay in installments. She or He who teaches the course should be able to teach you to drive (since it’s their job.) Even if you’re home-schooled most schools will allow you into the DE course.
as for a job, i myself am having the same issue. you should just keep going out and filling out applications. don’t be upset if the job isn’t exactly dreamy, a job is a job and
it pays bills and buys school clothes.
I know
it must be really painful that your own father would do these things but you have a heavenly Father. I don’t know if you believe in God or not, and I won’t pressure you to, but just know that you do have one 
and he loves you very much.
I would encourage you to find a good positive father figure in maybe a favorite teacher of yours or perhaps a neighbor you get a long with. someone who will encourage you and really do the good things a father would do for his son.
ha ha
i don’t know about you but where i come from nerd is a compliment. I’m a literature nerd XD and i love every bit of it!! 
its nothing to be ashamed of it shows intelligence and talent because not everyone has the brains for getting their nerd on XD
just remember if your dad can’t man up and be a dad to you as well then he isn’t worth worrying over (as much as it may hurt.) i don’t mean to just shut him out of your life because that wouldn’t solve anything, i just mean that you shouldn’t care about his opinion of you at all. I’m super proud that you actually tried to fix this problem and i suggest you try one more time to seriously sit down and tell him to get his act together for you. serious confrontation is something to consider. call him out on his promises in a way he cannot deny them. if you do this then you can say you tried and be completely blameless in the fact that your relationship with him isn’t that great. you tried and that’s what counts.
try and find a good school program or club or team to join that you enjoy. debate, chess, forestry, or whatever clubs your school has to offer, join one that could give you a chance at a scholarship and also a very good
:/ also, stick up for yourself. get the point across to the step dorks that you don’t like them messing with you and that they should back off (just don’t go crazy with it o.o be smart about it)
Good luck!!! and happy late birthday and late merry Christmas
References :